Hello everyone,
It has been way too long! Seems like I find myself back here when something is going wrong. Feel bad that I haven't updated on all the wonderful things that have happened.
Quick recap:
Was diagnosed in 2009 after I thought I had an ear infection but failed my hearing test miserably. Thank goodness for my wonderful primary doctor ordering the MRI. Found the 1.3cm tumor in my left auditory canal. I freaked out and didn't know what to do. Had so many consults with almost every doctor in Los Angeles and in the end decided to have the tumor removed. After hassling with my insurance to get the procedure covered with the doctors/hospital I wanted under my HMO benefit, I went in for surgery in 2/2010. Minutes before surgery, my surgery was cancelled. Turns out they run blood tests for a reason ... I was pregnant! More shocked that I wasn't having surgery, my family was more upset at the fact that I was having another baby with my husband (we were separated at the time). Leave it to me to be the 1% of people who's contraceptive fails after using the same one for years, but that is a whole other story. Gave birth to my second child and was able to be home with him for a while before deciding to reschedule my surgery. Ended up having a whirlwind romance with a former love and three weeks after reconnecting, we began our journey to happiness. Despite my love and I being in the midst of challenging divorces with heated custody issues and the shock to our family that we were moving so fast, I felt physically and mentally ready to have my surgery once and for all. Had a successful surgery on Valentine's Day 2012 at USC and recovered quickly. A few weeks of vestibular therapy helped me work out my balance issues and I returned to work 4 months after surgery. I decided to have the BAHA implant and had that done at House Ear Clinic in December 2012 but as of today, still haven't actually been able to get fitted for the actual device since I haven't been able to come up with the $500 fitting fee that isn't covered by my insurance. We've just come to love my screw as is and joke that it's my Bluetooth! One day I'm sure I will actually get the device and will be amazed at the fact that I can hear again! Had a beautiful wedding in May 2013 and while I've had a few issues (had some screws loose that were redone when the BAHA was implanted) nothing major.
Recently though I've been having a lot of headaches. Pain around my incision/plate/BAHA site. Can't seem to wear my contacts for more than 2 days at a time. Some periodic vertigo symptoms. All of which I've just been attributing to stress and anxiety. Went in to have my eyes checked last week and the doc had me do the peripheral exam 4 times because I kept failing. After talking with me about how it was likely a fluke since my eyes are otherwise healthy, I mentioned the AN surgery and his eyes opened wide and he began to ask me questions as if intrigued by a possible explanation for the riddle. He explains that maybe pressure is being placed on my optic nerve and suggested I see my doctor. After having excruciating headaches the last few days (migraine symptoms, ear pain, nausea, some vertigo, lots of neck pain) and knowing that my eyes are wigging out, I went to see my doctor today.
Just figured maybe some scar tissue, the titanium plate, or another loose screw would likely be the source. Haven't had a post MRI done ever but he ordered one today. When he suggested that it sounded like the tumor may in fact grown again, I was blindsided. It never occurred to me that it may actually be back. Now I find myself back at square one. Scared out of my mind at the idea that my brain tumor may be back. So many unanswered questions. More waiting for authorization for the MRI then waiting for the results. Seems all too familiar and I don't want to be here again. I want to be a happy post op patient with no complications. Instead I find myself back on this blog asking myself, "Can this be happening to me again?!"