Depression

[phx]

Thanks for all the comments everyone! I appreciate them so much. This is a great forum and I know there are always people willing to listen on here.


PHX

[pmcollings]

Hope you are feeling better - would be interested to know as I am going thru the same thing but 2 months post op. 

[millie]

Hope you are feeling stronger and better too.  I am also someone who battles depreession/anxiety  after the trans-lab surgery ten weeks ago.

[Glenda]

I see this thread was started in 2010 but so glad I saw it.  I am feeling so many of the same things I have read about here.  I am 5 weeks from surgery and already co-workers are asking when I'm coming back.  I feel so frightened of going back to work.  Still can't deal with the dizziness, had hearing before surgery and now SSD with lots of tinnitus.  Sometimes when I am tired it roars so loud I can't hear well out of my good ear.  It makes me want to hide and be by myself away from noise.  My Mom told me my great-aunt is dealing with hers and she is 90, she was talking about tinnitus.  My great aunt never had a brain tumor and lost her hearing along with the other things that come with brain surgery.  I Thank God for this site because I feel I would really be crazy without you all who understand.  Others look at me and say I look so much better and they are glad I am so much better.  My face does look better but on the inside I am so scared because of the changes.  I know I have a ways to go and because of this forum I know it will get better but it hurts that others have no comprehension of what I am going through.  They think I will be back to the normal before surgery and that can never be, I need time to adjust to that.....Thanks for your posts and thanks for being there to all of you!
Glenda

[millie]

Glenda I feel exactly the same as you.  People tell me I look so much better, and my face is actually much improved, but the feeling I have in my head, and the complete deafness on that side, plus the eye that isalso better but not blinking in sinc with the right and needs drops and ointment, get me down.  You are only five weeks out-we have to hang on to the idea on this forum  it's a journey and it takes time and we need to be patient.  I can see how it would be frightening to go back to work-I am fortunate to be retired .    Yes, thank God for this forum. 
The last couple nights, as I lay awake, I tried praying a bit more-also, I get up and make a list of at least 3 positive things to do next day. 
The doctors have said we will get better.  We have to believe that. 
When do you see your doctor again?  What does he say?  Do you have any sick time left?
I understand.
Mil

[MDemisay]

 To All,

I too have been depressed!

 But you have to realize that after a while it does get better you settle in to your "new" normal.....you learn to live with your deficits you get stronger! After some time living with single sided deafness, you get used to it. People that you thought were your friends disappoint you and fall into an aqaintance category or worse.

This hurts the most, but all in all you will adjust, just don't give up on yourselves you still have plenty to give.....For those of you just going back to work ease yourself in if your schedule will allow, don't rush back in or you will certainly be overwhelmed! Go easy on yourself, handle each difficulty as it comes, learn to sigh and then try, try again!

Being here among friends who truly understand what you may be going through has been a blessing for me....Being virtually by myself from 2004 through 2012 was isolating and made me feel strange.....Then I came to this ANA forum and I could express my feelings and stuff I kept inside for so long!

Most of what I'm trying to say here is now that you know that we share this common diagnosis, it should make it easier on you to know that someone has gone through it before and will not judge you (as others will who do not have an AN). This gets tiresome after awhile, I know, but you will learn to live with it.

This is the "new" you!  Celebrate the fact you have survived the ordeal! The fair weather friends will fall away, those that stick with you are your true friends!

If you have been through this ordeal, you are tough! Don't give up on yourself!

I don't bring it up much, but in desperation, in 2004, I went on to another website that deals with mostly metastatic brain tumors.(by mistake).....It was some time before I realized that what most of us share here is that there is hope for us, that we will live! We share  benign brain tumors..(Shortly before I went in to surgery I discovered the ANA).

In that, there is hope! It is not as bad as it may seem!

Sure life will have changed for most of us, but at least we have each other that we can lean on. We truly are blessed to have this forum!

Have a decent weekend and a Happy New Year (certainly a better one than the last)!

Your Friend,

Mike

[millie]

Thanks, Mike.  God bless you.
Mil

[Glenda]

Thanks for sharing Mike!  You are so right!  This forum is a life saver.

Mil, I go back to the Dr on Jan 31st.  I am currently on short term disability and approved through that date.  It can be extended if the Dr gives them medical evidence so I guess we will see what happens when I go back.  I have a little less than 6 years until I can retire, if I can afford to at that time.  I am just so scared of going back, I hate not feeling like myself.  I know I will get adjusted but I haven't yet.....I hope the Dr will give me a little more time, if not maybe he will only approve part time for awhile....Hang in there too, we shall make it!
Glenda