Graduate school or Teachers who have had ANA surgery

[kippy6]

I had my ANA surgery 8 years ago when I was still a stay-at-home mom.  I started working at a school as a paraprofessional in 2011.  A year ago, I was accepted to a Graduate School program for initial teacher certification in Special Education. This is a big deal for me, since I am in my mid-40's. Also, it has been over twenty years since I received my BA. I am almost done with my graduate school coursework, and believe it or not I have a 4.0. In some classes, I was even one of the A's when mostly B's were earned. Every day, I am thankful to God that He has allowed me to make good grades despite my history of brain tumor surgery. I would be lying if I didn't tell you that I have been working very hard. I actually took all of my state teacher tests as well, and passed them with flying colors.

I have never told my advisor or any of my instructors that I have a history of a brain tumor. But just recently, I had to tell my advisor/instructor that I was SSD. I am finding that while I did get used to the SSD, that maybe it takes awhile to generalize this across all settings. When I am actually the one taking a course, I have found that I really need to be able to hear every word, and it is frustrating me when I miss what my instructor is saying. This only happens in certain classrooms where the acoustics of the room creates more of an echo or if a fan is on (combined with my one fast-talking instructor). I have talked to the instructor recently about this, and they are making accommodations.

Also, it has occurred to me that maybe I have been asking people to repeat things for so long that I don't realize it anymore. Just this week, I was talking to a graduate school classmate who has been in some of my classes in the past year. She is a little older than me, and she is working on her MA, so she has already been teaching for many years. So I told her that I am deaf in my right ear... She seemed VERY irritated and said, "you need to tell people that." And I said politely, "you think so?" She said, "yes, because when they have to repeat things to you..." So I started to tell her, well I had a brain tumor (first time I've ever mentioned this in grad school).... and she cut me off and said, "that's personal." And I said, "I'm still getting used to it I guess." Her response bothered me. But I get it. I guess if my disability is going to cause someone else to work harder, then I should probably tell them what is going on so I'm not leaving them guessing what is wrong with me.

Perhaps I need to be more cognisant of the times I am asking people to repeat things and explain to them I am deaf in one ear? I would love some advice on whether or not to tell people in your work place (especially a school).

[Tod]

Tell people. I am never shy about it. In part because of the hearing issue. Even though I have a BAHA, it is useless at a reception or official dinner where the noise is a cacophony of people talking and shmoozing. Further, because of remaining speech issues, those same conditions cause me to lose my voice and go hoarse.

I have also been coughing for four years now so I feel compelled to say, "I'm not sick, I have a brain tumor."

I work in state government/higher ed coordination and to this day, it is has never been a problem to explain this to people.

Best of luck,

Tod

[Jim Scott]

Hi, Kippy ~

I'm also SSD but retired (and didn't work in education) so my advice is necessarily based on what I would do, not necessarily what I have done in a work environment.

I would let people know about your SSD, as needed.  This is what I do when someone whispers in my deaf ear and I have to ask them to repeat it in my 'good' ear or when I simply miss something being said that I can sense I need to know.  Frankly, this doesn't happen that often but most of my friends are well aware of my SSD even if I never mention it.  Most also know why I'm SSD and are sympathetic. 

However, friends and co-workers are usually quite different.  The woman who acted annoyed when you told her you're SSD probably had to repeat something to you and assumed you weren't paying attention to her (that's annoying) or spoke to you on your deaf side and you never responded so she assumed you were purposely ignoring her, making her impatient with you, less than sympathetic and dismissive when you mentioned having a brain tumor.  I would not seek out this woman unless it is absolutely necessary because she is clearly insensitive to your SSD and seems to resent the fact that have it.  That kind of attitude can reflect a Narcissistic personality that makes interactions difficult. 

That stated, I would certainly tell those you work with that you're deaf in one ear - and tell them which ear so - one hopes - they'll remember to talk toward your hearing side.  That and 'positioning' (as I do) are the two best ways to compensate for your SSD short of acquiring a BAHA or other hearing device.  As one who has coped with being SSD for over a decade (I lost my bilateral hearing long before my AN was discovered) I submit that the condition is somewhat of an impediment but quite manageable if one chooses to go that route, as we have.

Jim

[kippy6]

Thanks guys. I have had to work with her in groups in some of my classes in the past year. I do remember asking her to repeat herself on 2-3 occasions, as she talks kind of fast and soft. I guess it is just different for me in the classroom environment with me being a student. If I tell a classmate I'm SSD, then the rest of the class can potentially hear me say that too. I am kind of a private person. I don't like the idea of a whole classroom of peers knowing about my personal life and I know nothing about theirs. So for that reason, I didn't tell her at first. I only told her last week as I could see she was a little irritated that I had asked her, "what?" yet again (she sits to my right). I think that is something I am going to have to get over.

Also, in my graduate level classes, I do have to ask certain instructors to repeat things more than my peers do. Not often (maybe once or twice every other class period). This combined with saying, "what?" to my peers may give the illusion that I am slow to my peers. If the class perceives me as slow before they even get to know me, then I am at a disadvantage. It is a tricky situation.

I really didn't want to begin an 8-week graduate level class with an announcement to my whole entire class that I am SSD. Maybe I should. If you say, "what" more than anyone else, I think your peers would probably start talking about you, trying to figure out what is wrong with you. I have laughed to myself, and thought maybe I should just walk in to the first day of class with a sign that indicates I am SSD.



 

[ASG]

One option you might consider is checking out your school's services for students with disabilities.  I've taught several undergraduate courses and my experience is that these services are very willing to advocate for students requiring a wide range of needs.  Most of the students I've worked with have psychiatric issues or learning disabilities, but I've heard that these services are very useful for students who need special accommodations due to hearing loss.  For example, students with hearing problems may receive accommodations allowing them to place microphones at the front of the class and listen to lectures on headphones, record lectures, or use some sort of automated note-taking software.  I'd be shocked if SSD students were not eligible for this.

Probably more important to the situation you described, however- using services for students with disabilities allows for a more discreet and effective way to communicate your hearing issue to professors.  These services inform professors of 1) a brief description of the student's disability 2) the accommodations that they are mandated to have in class and 3) a notice that this information is private and cannot be shared with anyone.  And because these notices come from the university and not the student themselves, you're far less likely to get an "annoyed" or snarky response.  Just something to think about!

Adam

[Crazycat]

"However, friends and co-workers are usually quite different.  The woman who acted annoyed when you told her you're SSD probably had to repeat something to you and assumed you weren't paying attention to her (that's annoying) or spoke to you on your deaf side and you never responded so she assumed you were purposely ignoring her, making her impatient with you, less than sympathetic and dismissive when you mentioned having a brain tumor.  I would not seek out this woman unless it is absolutely necessary because she is clearly insensitive to your SSD and seems to resent the fact that have it.  That kind of attitude can reflect a Narcissistic personality that makes interactions difficult."

Well said Jim.

  I've come across the same personality type. Not easy to deal with. In fact, an absolute horror show, like living in a web of fear and distrust.  I especially liked the "That's personal" part.  It's like, "How DARE YOU say anything designed to elicit one iota of compassion or concern for something other than MYSELF!!??"......spare me...."

Isn't it sad? You feel you have to hide something like this from your classmates, almost as if they are not human and impervious or above sickness and disease? Anything for a leg up.