Rude People Rant

[lori67]

Soundy -

We knew you weren't nuts!  But I guess it's nice to hear it from someone who's qualified to tell you that.

I hope that you are able to work this out and move past it so you don't ever have to feel this way again.  It's amazing how much something in the past can still hurt us sometimes, even when we thought it was long over with.

And I agree with Jan, that sounds like a great doctor you have.  They should all listen to their patients and be as comforting as he sounds.

Hang in there.  There's a light at the end of the tunnel!

Lori

[Brendalu]

Soundy,
It sounds like you have a gem of a PCP!  Good luck and I'm keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
Hugs,
Brenda

[Soundy]

My PCP is my second favorite man on earth... he is a friend as well as my doctor which at times
can be awkward but he knows me inside out and that is a big help...me and
his wife did a pregnancy together...love him to bits and have informed him he can not
retired til I expire... 

I have been away from ex for over 12 years and thought this stuff didn't bother me ... but talking to
doctor and thinking since  , I know it does ... I just push it back and don't think about it much...time
to toss out old baggage I guess... maybe old lady whacking me was a blessing in disguise... I was realizing
yesterday that the anger that still lingers was not even focused at her but at past ... she just opened
the wounds...

Didn't sleep great last night but felt better today ... things are gonna start looking up... I can tell...I feel
lighter

[leapyrtwins]

Soundy -

I'm glad to hear you are feeling better.

IMO, the affects of a bad marriage never really leave you.  You can ignore the bad feelings and your anger, but they are always there in the back of your mind.  Sometimes the wounds get opened back up when you least expect it.  My ex was abusive - not physically, but verbally - so I can relate to what you are going through.  I'd like to say that I've taken the high road and have been able to forgive him, but I don't think I'll ever forget the things he put me and our children through.

Just take things one day at a time, and remember that life is better without him 

Stay strong,

Jan   

[Soundy]

My ex was also emotionally abusive... I think in alot of ways that was worse than
the physical end of things...heals slower

Thought I had completely forgiven him but maybe not... or may have and just not did the
forgetting part of forgiveand forget

Already doing better...still up and down at night but two nights with no bad dreams...

[Soundy]

Today I did self imposed therapy... I knew from the van driver that he would be taking the little cane
wielding lady to town and she would be dropped off at Walmart at around 7:45 and be there for an hour ...
so I went to Walmart and did a little shopping and looked for her... I just happened to walk down the
aisle she was on and got a little close to her cart... I go ...excues me and move my cart over ...she
looks up and did a little double take and looked sheepish but said that's OK...

I act like I was shopping and after a moment she says I'm sorry about my outburst... I tell her that is OK..
all is forgiven... I asked if she needed any help today and she said she didn't think so , that she didn't have much
to pick up but thank you for asking ... we talked about crazy weather... it was 60 at 5 am yesterday and 35
the morning before and talked about flowers ... she got some cat food for a new kitten ... I told her I had lost
my 15 year old dog this week...nice little visit... we parted ways with a See ya later...

My husband said to avoid her before I was reported as a stalker or got whomp again but I decided to
make sure we met again... I feel better for it and I think she did to...at least she was smiling when we parted...
it was an odd but nice little visit...

I am sleeping a bit better and no crazy dreams ...and all is right (almost) with my world   

[lori67]

Good for you, Soundy.  I'll bet all is almost right in her world too.  I'm sure you made her day by caring about her feelings.

You did a nice thing and should feel good about it and yourself.  I just finished reading the book "A Complaint Free World" by Will Bowen.. I think that's his name...good book.... he says that "anger is fear directed outward" - so maybe her anger was just her way of expressing her fear of her situation and fear of not being able to do the things she used to do - like shop without help.  Maybe you helped her start to overcome some of her fear of asking for help - graciously instead of beating people into "wanting" to help her.

Smile!  It's all water under the bridge now!!   
Lori

[GRACE1]

Two times at work, when several people in my department were standing around tallking, I spoke up about something and my boss said "Shush!"  I am deaf in my right ear, so I may talk a little louder than normal.  But she does not have to treat me like a child.  I am 57 years old, after all.  I just think this is rude of her.

[Crazycat]

I finally got to your post Soundy.

Try to keep a couple of things in mind: 1, Life is a proverbial "battlefield" and proving ground for virtually everyone in one way or another, regardless of whether they are are impaired or not in some way, shape or form; and 2), There are many individuals humping around out there that are far worse-off than many of us here on this forum will EVER be from our dilemma.

Generally speaking, the rule is that a person can never truly understand what it is like to endure any particular condition or predicament until he or she is experiences it physically and psychologically for themselves, firsthand. Then, and only then can one really understand, know, commiserate and empathize with another individual in a similar predicament. 

Yet it is true that there are people that are so blatantly rude, obnoxious and even pugnacious that the only way to handle them ( like an animal trainer) is with equal and opposite force like that jerk in the video store—i.e., "fighting fire with fire".

[Captain Deb]

Soundy,
I'm so happy that you allowed that compassionate place inside you to awaken.  The world needs more people like you!

Capt Deb

[er]

I am so sorry for your experience. I have not yet had that kind of experience but I do see it around me. It embarrasses me to see that kind of actions out of people. I firmly believe in to do on to others as I would like them to do on to me.
I do see some clerks or people look frustrated with me and then I realize they have tried speaking to me and I didn't hear them. So I'll ask if they said something to me, and if they say yes I explained I am deaf  on my left side, and they are very understanding and they will repeat what they had said.
eve 

[Omaschwannoma]

I, along with many here have encountered rude people and have found a very simple way to deal with their unsolicited statements.  "I can't hear you when you talk to me that way."  Have a nice day everyone!

[Soundy]

I had to run into town yesterday and ran into the lady ... she was with a man maybe 30 years old ...she
waved and said hi... glad I didn't pick up cane and beat her as my first instinct was ... and hope that it was
just a bad day for her when she hit me and not as habit she has ...

Movie check out guy is now at Mc Donald's ...

Crazycat... life is a battle field... and I have been fighting some impairment or another pretty much since birth and
try not to let it change the way I deal with people ... born with miss made elbow,knee and hip joints...was told I
would be wheelchair bound by 20 or so at 46 I am still going ... I have always had a gait all my own now enhanced
with the pirate swagger  ...
then lupus which is invisible most of the time and the the AN also invisible ... I have  people tell me all the time
I don't look sick when dealing with lupus issues ... looks as you all know can be deceiving ...I can look OK and feel like
crawling in a hole and hiding from  the world ... but I have not yet let how my body is feeling make me act rudely
to others ...

I think you are right in that some people are going to be rude or obnoxious just because that is the way they are ...
I am hoping the little cane carrying  lady is not one of them or if she is she will at least think before acting next
time she feels slighted

Part of the nail patella syndrome that created my odd joints  , is also odd misshapen thumbnails ... this seems to be
of more concern to people than things that give me real trouble they just look funny but are painless...

one rude woman who kinda cornered my mom , myself and three siblings whan I was about 8 kept on and on about
our lack of thumbnails ... wouldn't take my moms explainatition that we were born that way ... told mom that she was
not giving us enough milk and vegtables and that she needed to give us vitamins ... mom shut her up after about 5
minutes of politely listening by telling her that we were extremely bad children and as punishment she had pulled our
thumbnails out with pliers... I guess not the right answer but it did make the woman stop talking ...today it would probably
get me arrested if I were to say that ... my youngest daughter has no thumbnails or knee caps ...when kids ask her
what happened she just tells them she was special ordered... she has a better outlook on it than I did because I was never
taught how to handle things ... had to learn as I go along

[Mary 117]

Wow Soundy, Your Mom sounds like a great person. Of course, you are amazing also. I know about that invisible Lupus. There were days that I would drop the kids off at the grocery store and wait for them to get the groceries we needed (they were about 10 &12), because I hurt so bad I could hardly walk. I'm sure if you saw me sitting there you would say there is a healthy young Mom being really lazy. I try never to judge by the outside because I know how much some people carry on the inside that's invisible to me.

You are a wonderful person to carry and care so much!

Mary