Hi Nicole--
I don't remember being especially sore after my '89 surgery (mostly I remember being zonked for 2 months...
) But I do remember my back being especially achy after the nerve graft the following year, and as Jan describes, it mostly had to do with sleeping in weird positions to avoid putting pressure on the incision (which was not on my head that time, but on the back of my neck on the AN side).
I know that, as I've gotten older, I have to change positions frequently at night or my back and neck hurt like heck--I am actually worried about what I'll do when sleeping on my back or the AN side are ruled out as options (at least initially!)
I wonder if in your case--in addition to your position during surgery and your posture now--the positions you are getting in as you care for (or lift?) your toddler may be part of the issue, too? If you are able to, I'd think yoga or gentle stretching would be helpful.
Hang in there!