Lisa,
I'm with Jan - all good questions. Definitely the first one I'd ask: "You have done this before, right?".
I can't speak for everyone, but my implant site healed quite well. I was able to wash my hair the night of the surgery - however, I chose to take some drugs and go to bed!
I was a little loopy from the general anesthesia, but I wasn't in pain. Some people are told not to wash their hair for a few days or a few weeks. I was fortunate that my doctor doesn't have a problem with it, but they all seem to have their own special little way of handling it, so I'm sure yours will give you good instructions.
While mine was in the healing stage, I used bacitracin - usually only at night though because it's pretty gooey. On occasion, I have a little "flare-up", for lack of a better description. It just gets a little puffy around the abuttment and I have some steroid cream to put on it and it's usually good within a day. It seems to happen whenever I let myself get dehydrated - when I'm not feeling well or when I'm traveling by plane. It's a good reminder for me to drink more water.
It's not hard to keep clean and doesn't require a lot of maintenance. After a while it just becomes second nature to wash your abuttment in the shower!
Hope your appointment goes well!
Lori