Post op, depression 1.5 years later?

[Machia2332]

Hi everyone

So, I had a 3.4 cm AN removed May 2016.  My recovery has probably been better than average.  Hearing loss on right side, some facial weakness, but at this point getting eye closure on the affected side.  (Still some eye dryness.) .

Some short-term memory has been foggy and sometimes I need to "search" for the right word a few more seconds when speaking, but overall doing well physically.

My question is about depression.  I didn't notice any significant depression for over a year after surgery, but recently have had 3-4 one-day spells of it.  I'm wondering if anyone has noticed late-onset depression?  I had been drinking a fair amount of alcohol during the time both in the months before surgery and during a good part of the year after surgery.  I thought this could be a factor, so I stopped completely about 3 weeks ago.  I definitely felt better, but the depression is still creeping back in.  I also struggle with OCD, I've noticed a few others mention this too.  (The OCD symptoms have definitely been better controlled since stopping the alcohol consumption.) . Any thoughts?  Thanks 

[daoisthere]

Hi Macchia,

I am a 27 year cancer survivor of full body radiation.  Getting this AN was like icing on the *&^ cake.  Thank you for sharing so candidly. I too am facing bouts of depression and am quite OCD.  Being a part of this forum has helped me to understand that I don't walk alone.  Finding peace in the mist of the event is quite a challenge.  I see the same psychologist that I have seen for the last 27 years. She has helped me sort through some of the (*& storms.   The different voices of some of the Hero members of this group have helped calm the storm.  I for one am walking with you.

Peace,
Daoisthere
 

[milhaus]

Daoisthere:

I have had cancer and an AN too! I am 27. I didn't have to have radiation or chemo though. Mine was in my eye and was surgically removed. So I am blind in one eye and deaf in one ear after my translab, among other issues.

Machia2332:

I too have been diagnosed with OCD, although I feel like I have almost completely beaten it at this point. I used to drink a lot too. I started drinking to control my anxiety, because my OCD was completely out of control. Turns out some of the things I was feeling that were really aggravating my OCD were symptoms of a brain tumor. I saw a psychologist who helped me out a lot. I have had pretty severe depression for years, I have never been able to get help with that.

I'm not really sure what the link is between AN and depression. It seems very common. Are people with AN's more likely to be depressed because of the experiences they go through, or is the depression caused by damage to the brain during surgery? Both? The answer would be helpful for us all. I think you will never know why you are depressed and if it is related to the AN. The available treatments are the same no matter the cause though, so don't be afraid to get help if you think you need it.

Andrew

[daoisthere]

Hi Andrew,

My best guess is that everyone at one time does come to terms with the idea that there really is no 'super' outcome with any objective treatment for an AN.   Depression might be an expression of dealing with the decision that you made.   I for one am not thrilled with my decision to watch and wait. 

Clearly drinking is not a favorable way to deal with it... as it too could lead to even a steeper emotional decline.  Acclimation seems to be a good goal.  Seeking console is also favorable.  I work out daily. It seems to help me take my mind off of the watch and wait mode. 

With this said, all AN survivors still have to cope with everyday life regardless of their outcome.  Everyone on this forum is a bit of a hero even if they face depression or pain.   

Peace,
Daoisthere 

[KayaParker]

The thread is from six years ago, but your experience with post-op depression is a relevant and important topic. Recovery from surgeries can be challenging, and it's not uncommon for mental health issues to arise even after a significant period post-surgery.
It's commendable that you took steps to address alcohol consumption and noticed an improvement. However, if depression persists, don't hesitate to reach out for professional support.
For those interested in understanding mental health further, check out the website that provides valuable information about signs of borderline personality disorder (BPD). Take care of yourself and remember, seeking support from professionals and loved ones is crucial on your journey to well-being!