Hi friends,
It's been quite a while since my last post. I'm back for an update, support, and advice from my fellow partners who surely know best the situation we live with. This is a long story so I'll try to condense it into facts, procedures, and my standard of living.
It's been about 7 years since my CK treatment. The tumor is darkened (necrosis) and should be dead. However, to date the tumor has not shrunk (which I believe is unusual). Then, approximately 3 years ago I was diagnosed with Trigeminal Neuralgia (TN). After many months of treatment from head and neck pain specialists, I contacted my neurosurgeon for a 2nd time and they decided to do a MRI. The first time I contacted them they did not think that the tumor would be causing the TN. She said that would be really unlikely to get TN from the tumor. But, the results showed the tumor pressing on the blood vessel which is pressing on my facial nerve. Thus, the cause for my TN. I'm NOT advising anyone not to do CK because of what happened to me. There are unknowns. This was my situation. It is rare from what I understand.
I tried anti-seizure medications (Gabapentine, Tegretol) for the TN and the side effects were very trying in regards to lethargy, sleepiness, concentration, and fatigue besides the stuff I already deal with like (Tinnitus, balance issues, depression, hyperacusis, headaches, fatigue, and of course SSD) I continued to work as best I could. Being in outside sales I had the liberty of a flexible schedule. I could not continue on those anti-seizure drugs so I had Gamma Knife (GK) to treat my TN at the Mayo Clinic. The Mayo shot radiation into the ganglion with the purpose of deadening the facial nerve to block the chronic pain signals being sent to the brain. Well, the GK did not work for my TN. I was left with the chronic pain and now a lifetime of facial numbness, tingling, and less feeling.
There is a wonderful Facial Pain support group in MN that I attend. At the suggestion of a fellow sufferer and a Dr. from the U of M that regularly attends, that I try a medication called Oxcarbazepine. It helps somewhat but nearly not where I need to be. But some relief is greatly welcomed.
My questions to you my friends are these: (BTW, I'm 52 years old)
Do any of you still suffer from cognitive issues? My tinnitus is super loud. Sometimes so loud I can't hear someone else speak. My fatigue is high. I feel I need naps during the day to refresh some. I have anxiety and depression that are affected by the all of this and probably vice versa as well. The SSD is very mentally trying. Everyday I'm trying to figure out where sounds are coming from and positioning myself so I can hear someone speak. I am going to try a bicros hearing aid in the very near future.
Do you think the radiation (twice) once to AN and once for TN could be causing me fatigue and cognitive issues? Do any of you struggle with this in your lives years after that surgery?
I'm having a very difficult time making a decision as to whether to apply for SSID. I have been laid off 3 times since the AN. But still, I feel like I'm giving in to the effects of the diseases and having to admit I am disabled. Have any of you felt this same way? Like you've been defeated. This disease hit me in my prime career time and it really hurts me emotionally seeing how it affected my livelihood. However, I must do something career wise. I need to be productive, social, giving and receiving as a part of society.
Thanks friends!