Can I stay at seton hall alone? Can I go to San Diego instead?

[jtyler]

I am scheduled for surgery at House on May 29th. They told me I should be accompanied at seton hall but have any of you ever been able to stay there on your own?  I am having retro sigmoid for 2cm AN. I have messed up balance so anticipate that will be my major symptom after surgery

I live in Houston and my husband has to stay home to look after my triplets. All my girl friends are single mothers so cannot visit.  I am English and all my family are in Europe so won't visit.  Plus I don't wish to concern them by telling them about my brain tumor and brain surgery until I am better. I am pretty stoic, in great athletic shape and recover well from surgeries. Obviously I have never had brain surgery before but I was up walking next day after c section and after full tummy tuck and was back at work within days of each of these previous surgeries. I know it will be pretty sad to do this surgery trip on my own, but the most important thing is that I am getting the best surgical care.  I can deal with the loneliness

from your experience do I physically need to have someone with me? Will the hospital let me be there on my own?  Are any of you staying at seton hall around the same time?  Will house let me go to San Diego for my 8 days instead ( I have friends I can stay with down there)?

[mk]

Hi,

I totally understand your situation. My family also lives in Europe and my husband had to stay home with our two children.  In fact, this situation was what prevented me from seeking surgery in the first place. I wondered for a long time if I could make the trip by myself. In the end though, when my mother retired from her work, she flew all the way from Europe to accompany me for my surgery (which was a 5 hour flight from where I live).
Frankly, I don't know what I would have done without her. I had what I would consider a very good recovery, I was able to walk around  after I was discharged. But still, having someone around to help with meals and all other needs was necessary. It was also important during the first few days in the hospital, even though I received excellent care.
Even though eveyrone is different, brain surgery is not a C-section, and there is no way to tell in what shape you will be after the surgery. This is the one situation where asking for help is more than warranted and I am sure your family might be more than happy to help.
This is my personal experience. I am sure that others will chime in. I have also heard that sometimes there are agencies that have nurses, or other stuff available at some hospitals who can help out with patients who need help. Perhaps you could ask about it at the House?
Regarding San Diego, there are people who had a bit of a drive after being discharged from hospital, although usually a long drive is no fun. For sure I wouldn't drive by myself. Would your friends be able to come and pick you up and drive you there?

Good luck with everything
Marianna

[CHD63]

jtyler .....

I have to ditto everything Marianna said.  Also, does your doctor at House know you are considering going there for surgery with no one accompanying you?  I may be wrong about the requirements at House, but around here I cannot even go for a short-stay procedure (such as an endoscopy or colonoscopy), without a responsible adult with me.

This is one time you really do need someone with you at discharge.  The nursing staff will take care of you in the hospital, but you are going to be very light-headed (at the very least) for several days afterwards.

Try to get your San Diego friend(s) to come and stay with you.

It's a rather long story but my husband and I went with another couple we met at Seton Hall (he had had mid fossa the same day I had translab) for an overnight getaway in Newport Beach, CA between discharge and stitch removal (on day and we both did fine ..... probably better than our spouses, who both were afraid we might overdo.  In all fairness, this was my second AN surgery ..... the first one was retrosigmoid three years earlier and I was thrown for a balance trip following the first one, plus double vision so there is no way I could have navigated anywhere on my own for several days.  Following the second surgery (translab), at House, I did not have the balance issues I did before, since I had already compensated following the first one.

I definitely would not want to have done either one on my own and I'm pretty stoic!

Clarice

[james e]

Traveling after the surgery can be difficult. I was up walking 15 hours after my surgery, but with help, and it was only for a few feet. I progressed to walking down the hall in the hospital on my own by the next day, but it was a struggle. My wife drove me home after 3 days from Houston to Austin, and it was an effort riding in the car. I was pretty big time wonky from having my vestibular nerve severed, and just about any rapid movement made my life difficult. I think you will need some help traveling.

Being alone is not the problem. In fact, I wanted to be left alone for the first 2 days...sleeping. Traveling alone on a plane from LA to Houston by yourself could be a mistake.

I did not go to House in LA because of the distance...returning home, followups, and now you throw in the children and no traveling companion. If I were you, I might reconsider the trip and stay in Houston. MD Anderson is a top ranked hospital in the world, and your previous post expressed your satisfaction with your doctors there. At least your husband can pick you up and drive you home. Just my 2 cents.

James

[stephSF]

I think you should have someone with you.  I went to HEI and Seton and my balance was pretty good but it is a very serious surgery and a support person is very important for A LOT of reasons.  You may need to stay at st Vincent's longer if you are alone.  Being at Seton is good because they can come for you quickly if you have a complication.   Just want the best outcome!!!!  Wish one of us could help you but I am 1000 miles from LA. 
Hugs
Stephanie