Hi, Jeepers,
I have been SSD since 1988, so here is my experience.
1) No problem whatsoever hearing alarm clocks, sirens, etc.
2) The biggest problem I have is sound localization. I look like an absolute idiot rotating my head while trying to locate the source of the sound, for example, when somebody calls me. I got Transear a year and a half ago (after my second surgery) and surprisingly it helps me localize the sound. It is no a guarantee, some people can do it and others cannot. Ii is probably the biggest help Transear has given me.
3) Ignoring sounds (and people) on my deaf side. I learned early to poll my deaf side periodically (every few minutes) and shift attention to it so it does not happen.
4) Hearing WOMEN on the deaf side. Men speak louder and do not gossip. Most people's hearing is better at the frequencies men speak anyway so it is less of a problem to begin with. Women (and that includes me) like to gossip which is softer than soft speech. Hearing it without any augmentation is difficult. Sometimes I appear slightly naive because I am out of the loop or stupid because I have no idea what has just been said.
5) Hearing in the remaining ear became too sensitive. Sirens are too loud. Very noisy situations require earplugs.
6) Compensation can be visual (looking at the lips or source of the sound) and cognitive ( knowing where the sound came from, where the person who just called you is standing, etc). After a while, I learned to automatically inspect my environment for potential sources of sounds and be aware of people's location in the room immediately upon entering, something that people with bilateral hearing do not have to do.
7)Structured situations (formal meetings, for example) is not an issue because usually there is no background noise and people are seating. I can compensate visually and cognitively really easily. Unstructured situations with a lot of background noise is a problem because things are happening too fast for me to compensate. An example would be my son's basketball game and trading floor (as in trading stocks). I always miss crucial information in these situations and just plain do not understand what is going on.
Here is what I learned over the years that helps:
1) Become best friends with the biggest gossip or chatterbox in town, office, etc. in order to be in the loop. This compensates for not hearing the gossip behind your back.
2) Realize that one-on-one is not a problem and you are not at a disadvantage here. Have confidence in what you hear. In an unstructured situation, approach a person and have a conversation at length while looking at his/her lips. Even with background noise, you can make out what the person says. My brain can actually suppress any background noise and just pick out what I want to hear. People vary in this respect. Somebody with ADHD will have a problem.
3) Become a central figure at a party, for example, host/hostess, presenter, organizer, helper, etc. This is very valuable in terms of people actually coming to you with the information instead of you straining to hear the conversation. It also allows to meet more people and they might come to you and strike a conversation. Being a wallflower is very isolating, makes you feel bad and socially damaging. Be active instead by creating a role for yourself. Impose your own structure on an unstructured and unfamiliar situation.
4) Immediately inspect your environment for potential sources of sound and people who might be calling your name (your boss, coworker, etc) This kind of thinking takes practice but after a while it happens automatically.
5) Position yourself on a good side if possible to hear better. Sometimes you do not want to reveal your SSD so it can be done inconspicuously.
6) Get BAHA, Transear or Cross hearing aids. In 1988, when I first had surgery, nothing was available. Now there is a choice. Highly recommend!
Hope this helped! Good luck!
Eve