Decision Time

[arizonajack]

If I can get the tumor removed, wouldn't that be the better outcome???

My opinion for the two cents that it's worth is that it wouldn't necessarily be a better outcome, it would just be a different outcome.

My options were kill the tumor with a half hour's worth of radiation (that's how long I was in the GK machine) or remove it with 7 hours of brain surgery with no guarantee of a different outcome either way.

My GK decision was a no-brainer (pun intended).

I'm no more qualified to analyze the options than any other layman so there came a time when I just put down all the data and made a decision based on my instinct and then stuck to it.

[TexasSprinter]

prwkent:  I went through the same analysis you are doing.  Whatever decision you make will be the right one for you.  For me, I chose surgery because I was afraid of the risk that radiation would not work and that the tumor would be more difficult to remove in the subsequent surgery due to scarring of tissue from the radiation.  That was one of the risk factors the doctors mentioned.  There are a dozen other risk factors for either approach you take, so all of the comments made by others posting responses are completely valid. 

[TexasSprinter]

Sorry--follow-up to my prior post.  That wasn't the only reason I chose surgery but it was an important one.  Among other reasons, I can't stand the thought of having a tumor in my head and I wanted to get it "out."  Maybe that's not rational, but it was still part of my thought process.   

[arizonajack]

Speaking of not rational thought processes, I'm still hoping to develope super powers from the radiation.

Nothing yet, darn it.

 

[New girl]

prwkent,

In terms of finding peace I must say I did not feel that way even though I knew I had come to the right conclusion for me.  I have read of numerous people on this forum finding peace after they made a treatment path decision but that is not always the case.  I was quite envious of them however not everyone finds this peace.  As others have stated just make sure you have done your homework (which is looks like you have!) and make the decision you feel is right for you.  Best wishes. 

arizonajack - I would definitely have gone with the radiation treatment if there was even a slim change of super powers! 

[TexasSprinter]

arizonajack--If I would have had greater certainty that I would have the same result as David Banner, I would have given radiation a shot.

[TexasSprinter]

(Dr. David Banner of the Culver Institute--not the rapper)

[prwkent]

I cannot make a decision.  No decision is also not the decision I want to make, and I'm getting anxiety now over this.  I keep thinking that if I have the GK, things will be a lot easier for me, but will I be kicking myself over symptoms that don't resolve because the tumor swells, etc. and nothing is out or ever will be.   The ear fullness and dizziness are my worst symptoms.    Same with surgery.  And if something goes badly, will I be kicking myself for not doing the GK. 

[kmr1969]

Prwkent,

What you are going through is perfectly normal.  It is a lot of data and a big decision.

I also think it is normal not to feel a sense of peace once you reach your decision.  It is still scary.  I waited for my peace to come after I choose surgery and it didn't  really come until I was ready to be wheeled into surgery.  For whatever reason, I knew then that I had made the right decision for me and that it was out of my hands.  It was a truly calm feeling.

It sounds like you have talked to some great doctors and that either option offers a great chance at dealing with your tumor.  Relax and give yourself some time to think.  You have two good courses of action.  Is one better than the other?  Who knows, but we all had to deal with that.  Whichever one you choose, it will be the right one for you. 

Best wishes that you will get your feeling of peace earlier than I got mine.

Ken

[TexasSprinter]

I agree with Ken 100%.  Lots of anxiety for me, too, as I wrestled with my decision.  I think that's perfectly normal, and in the grand scheme of life, 2 months so far on your decision making time is not a lot of time. 

[It is what it is]

It makes sense to me that it is difficult to feel at peace with your decision.  We are fortunate to have a decision to make between two good choices.  You really can't go wrong.  I'm very satisfied with my choice for my particular priorities and size of tumor.  I wish good things for you in your final decision.

 Karen

[prwkent]

I had GK today in Hackensack with Dr. Kondziolka and it was a good experience. If anyone has any questions as to the procedure feel free to chime in and I will respond.

I really appreciate everyones help and support.

[TexasSprinter]

prwkent:  Congratulations on your decision.  I hope things continue to go well. 

[arizonajack]

I had GK today in Hackensack with Dr. Kondziolka and it was a good experience. If anyone has any questions as to the procedure feel free to chime in and I will respond.

I really appreciate everyones help and support.

Congratulations.

If you're like the rest of us GK alumni you'll spend the next week or so poking at your pin spots. I couldn't help it.

Reading your post suddenly reminded me of a commercial from back in the 60s or so with the line "Rack 'em back in Hackensack." Can't for the life of me remember what the commercial was for.