Hello Kate or ‘Speechpathkate’ –
Wow you are wonderful for your friend. I think it could be boring for you but your presence is going to be important to your friend. You could be a personal advocate during their ICU and hospital visit. So depending on the surgery will depend on your involvement. Make sure that if they don’t have family present, there is an arrangement with the hospital that they can be visited by you following the surgery, such as in ICU. For me I had a six hour surgery; I was in ICU two days, and transferred into the hospital for two days, and then released and had to stay into the area for follow-up. My wife was with me in the prep area prior to be taken to the surgery suite. She awaited and after the surgery the doctors told her how I did. Once I was transferred into the ICU she because my advocate and continued helper. Although I was drugged up (waiting for anesthesia to wear off and on narcotics) I was cognizant and had needs. Needed ice chips, needed my glasses, need to hear her voice, needed a blanket, etc.. When the nurses get busy on incoming into the ICU and I was somewhat stable, I was not a priority. Now depending on the place they may not let you stay long. But I did have an incident my second night where I was very cold and I hit the nurse-call button over and over (my wife was only allowed to stay 10 minutes per say); I was actually shivering. But the ICU had an incoming emergency so no nurse attended to me. I felt abandoned and since I couldn’t walk there wasn’t much I could do. It was a scary thing for me. Following that episode I complained and from that time on my wife was allowed to stay all she wanted and I was very thankful. After being transferred into the hospital they wanted me to walk with a PT and I did. But I wanted to be doing more exercise to be released and I needed someone to help me. Once the catheter was removed I needed help getting to the bath room, getting my slippers on and so forth. And you can help your friend because usually surgery results in balance problems unless that has already happened. ANers need assistance to hang onto so we don’t fall after surgery during our early stages of walking. These things may seem little but I am SO very thankful for the help I got 24 hours/day that my wife (later daughter) took shift turns to help me. Don’t know if you’ll be able to do exactly the same (but try and stay as long as you can; even though surgery results in sleep; when I woke I needed HELP!). What helps? 1) being there to talks to 2) Assistance with little thinks (can you hand me that item, help me with my slippers, hand me chap stick, etc., and 3) Help taking little walks in the hospital hallways so the patient can be released as soon as possible. Finally, they may need someone to help in the release process to a safe and restful place. Craig