have you tried calling her and telling her how you feel? like "hi friend, i'm really lost and confused and i don't understand why you haven't called. i could really use a hug from my oldest friend about now" you never know...she might be on some other website wondering why you haven't called after being diagnosed w/ a brain tumor.
Kristin, if she is on a website wondering why
I haven't called
her since I was diagnosed, I hope there are people there to set her straight. That is, to tell her what a self-centered, selfish and inconsiderate fool she is being. Were I in the same place that she is and suddenly realized we hadn't spoken since her diagnosis, I would assume her not having called meant she was probably rightfully hurt that I hadn't called to check in on her. It's not that I'm not willing to call her. I'm not going to call her first though. If she doesn't offer her ear then I'm not going to ask for it. I won't call someone and dump my problems in their lap when it's obvious they don't care to hear them and I'm not going to throw her a free opportunity to be a better friend either. She's going to have to motivate herself to do that. As far as I'm concerned if she keeps this up than I'll be fortunate to know that she is actually not the friend I thought she was and alter her place in my life accordingly.
I'm the one that's going through something here. If it is hard for her and this is her way of expressing it, then she can go to Hell. I'm sorry that it's tough and I don't want my problem to cause too much stress for anyone but that's just the way it goes. Life is hard and when someone you love is going through something this unbelievably stressful and potentially life altering you swallow your stupid fear or awkward feelings and you make yourself available to them.
Here is the funniest part - I don't even need half the hand holding that she needed and got from me when her boyfriend broke up with her. How ironic is that? I remember thinking it was a bit absurd how much crying and whining and constant feeling sorry for herself she did but figured we each handle disappointment and heartache in different ways. I seriously just want to talk to her about it enough to keep her posted on my doctor's appointments and have her agree with me that the situation throughly sucks. Then I wanna talk about other stuff, like her new boyfriend and regular life!
Did I mention that she also kept me on the phone regularly whining for extremely long times when she fell and broke her arm? That was a
TRAGEDY. HOW could something that
AWFUL happen to
HER? The
POOR THING! Wow, writing about this has made me realize that she is a real mope and a whiner. Everything that goes wrong in her life is an absolutely unprecedented tragic event that requires all kinds of band-aids and attention. And I must be the biggest
doormat on the planet! I actually sent her flowers on Valentine's Day because her boyfriend had just dumped her and I wanted to cheer her up. I'm a total loser.
Also, since her life got back together, she calls me a lot less in general. In fact, the last time was when some internet date guy abruptly stopped talking to her.
WHAAA WHAAA WHAAA! But when I say I'd rather not meet her new boyfriend the day after my CT Scan reading and only 5 days after my MRI tumor diagnosis because my husband and I would rather be alone since we're under so much stress...her response? "That sucks". That was via AOL IM. There was a hint that I was feeling down and she never even asked how I was feeling or if I wanted to talk about it. She was too busy being disappointed because her next date wasn't going to be a double with us!
Man, I'm really starting to dislike this girl. My husband has noticed some of these things about her for months and has always thought she was not the best person. She's proving him right.