ANA Book Club?

[leapyrtwins]

I have finished the book.

And can't wait to discuss 

Jan

[Kaybo]

Jan~
I finished it last week & am anxiously awaiting discussion!!  I almost brought it in case I needed to refer to it, but I put in other books in hopes that I can read!!

Running to the hospital!!
K

[leapyrtwins]

Good luck, Kaybo.

You're in our thoughts and prayers,

Jan

[Kate B]

Here goes...the anticpation has built and there is lots to say. 

All opinions are welcome and as with any good book, there will be varying ones. One simple rule: Know that at times, there may be opposite viewpoints expressed. Although we don't have to agree, Book Club members welcome and respect all participant comments. There is no time limit to our discussion.

The role of the "queen" is to start the discussion with a question. Then it is up to the rest of the group to take the baton and go.  Jan as co-queen, after this question runs it course, please post the next one.

My Sister's Keeper presents so many avenues we can take with this discussion. Each character adds to the story in a rich way. Let's first start down the path with the question I first posted for pondering and we'll keep "talking" until we talk ourselves out. 

What is your opinion of Sara, the mom? With her life focused on saving Kate, she sometimes neglects her other children. What would you have done in her shoes?  Did you find yourself criticizing Sara, empathizing with her, or both?

[OMG16]

Queen Kate are we still pondering or is the game on?

I have been thinking alot about these issues and am more unsure of my position as each minute goes by.  This should be very interesting to hear each others views.  I myself believe there is no one right answer.  I think it will have alot to do with each of our life experiences and what we have learned so far from those experiences.  I to believe Kate is right that we all need to respect others views and maybe look long and hard about why we feel the way we do.  Keep and open mind and we could all learn and grow from this books moral questions.    16

[Kate B]

Queen Kate are we still pondering or is the game on?

I have been thinking alot about these issues and am more unsure of my position as each minute goes by.  This should be very interesting to hear each others views.  I myself believe there is no one right answer.  I think it will have alot to do with each of our life experiences and what we have learned so far from those experiences.  I to believe Kate is right that we all need to respect others views and maybe look long and hard about why we feel the way we do.  Keep and open mind and we could all learn and grow from this books moral questions.    16

This is it!!! It is the 30th.  Let the discussion begin:-)

[leapyrtwins]

Okay, I'll jump in 

It's hard to figure out what my opinion of Sara is.  In the beginning of the book, I thought she favored Kate too much and overlooked Anna and her feelings, but by the end of the book - especially reading what she had to say in court - I found myself changing my mind.

I think Sara actually did her best in a difficult situation.  Being a parent isn't easy and from my own experience, I know that even though I try to treat both my children the same, it's difficult to do because each child is different and has different needs.  In my case it's sometimes especially frustrating because my children are both the same age.  I can't even imagine having to deal with a child who is on the verge of death not just once, but numerous times.  Sara must have felt an enormous responsibility for Kate and her illness, and her way of coping was to try to find any way possible to keep Kate alive.  Being the "control freak" I am, I can totally relate to that.   

Sara should have made more of an effort to not neglect both Jesse and Anna, but she was too focused on Kate.  It's easy for me, as an outsider, to see this.  But oftentimes when it's your situation it's easier to overlook what you are doing wrong.  There are many parenting situations that I would have handled differently after the fact; but hindsight is 20/20.  You do the best you can do at the time, with the resources that are available to you.  I'm certain that Sara would have moved heaven and earth if it would mean that Kate would live, so she tended to conveniently overlook what being Kate's donor was doing to Anna.

Jan 

 

[sgerrard]

Isn't this a leap year? I thought it was still the 29th...

I stopped not liking Sara after a while. I think I came to see how she could be so obsessed with trying to keep Kate alive at any cost. I thought the ending really drove home the point, though, that missing out on the lives of her other children didn't make any sense.

I'm stealing a good quote from a post by Robyn:

"People say, 'Oh, it's too bad they died so young,' " Ms. Tullis, then working as a psychic counselor and living in a trailer park outside Los Angeles, told People in 2001. "I say, you don't understand. My kids lived every day of their lives. Every moment." 
The late Rusty Tullis, mother of Rocky Dennis from the movie "Mask" who died at 16, and her other son who died of AIDS at 32.

Anna lived every day of her life, every moment. Sara never got to see that. Maybe it is something about our culture, that we can completely ignore today, and spend all our energy trying to control the future.

Steve

[Kate B]

Isn't this a leap year? I thought it was still the 29th...

Oops...must have been international time or anticipation to start the conversation:-) 

[Kaybo]

i am not up to much except i cried my eyes out at the end...i startrd not"disliking" sara as much, but thought she gave up on jesse WAY too easy--couldn't she see he was reaching out?
k

[leapyrtwins]

Sorry to interupt the discussion, but I have to say welcome back Kaybo!  This is the first post op post (sounds a little funny) that I've read from you.

I'm so glad you feel up to posting,

Jan

[Kaybo]

thanks...now that i can wear my glasses again and see...i think that was part of the worst--i am legally blind w/o them so i was just in my own world!!
k

[Kate B]

Welcome back Kaybo!

I remember reading the part when Sara was served papers and the awkward tension in the whole room.  Of course that was right after Brian (Dad) had shared the constellation story about orpheus. Of course it was just as telling that immediately after reading the court papers, Sara had to choose between anger at Anna or tending to Kate, she did run to Kate.

[Kaybo]

I also thought that there was some "unhealthy" (not bad) closeness between Kate & Sara  - Only b/c they had lost all their other friends but each other - does that makes sense??
 k

[leapyrtwins]

K -

Do you mean unhealthy closeness between Kate & Anna? the two girls? 

I could see this being a problem for both of them.  In a way, they were more alike than Julia and her twin sister which seemed a little odd to me.  Not to say that all twins are alike, but the author seemed to make a point of showing how different Julia and her sister (can't recall her name right now) were.

Jan