So, its been three weekends since my tragic post AN surgery softball debut.
I wasn't going to let AN rob me of another activity I so enjoyed. I decided to practice some at home with my hand/eye coordination just to help me feel better.
Well, this past Saturday started like any other pre Christmas Saturday. I got up early, made some coffee and was ready to start the huge task of hanging up Christmas lights, when I got "THE CALL" to come play softball again. Awfully nervous and excited, but trying to remain calm, I said "1pm? Sure - I'll try and make it". I go into the bedroom and wake up the mrs to see if it was ok to ditch the lights and play softball. My lovely supporting wife reassures me with her nod of approval. As I walk away feeling even better, reality squashes me like a mallet on a thumb tack, " You want me to come, so the guys don't make fun of you?" Needless to say, she stayed home.
This time around, I showed up 30mins early at the park and waited on the others in my vehicle in the parking lot. Actually, I was so early that the mothers of the kids in the park started to get suspicious. I'd have to admit. I'd be suspicious of the strange looking man in the truck with the engine running. I was sure the police would show up any minute to haul me away. Well, the others showed up, and it was game time.
This time around, the shoes didn't fall apart. I played first base, which worked out well. I figured last time, my problem was running and catching, oh yeah, and falling. If I cut out one of those factors, I wouldn't have to be juggling several things at once. So first base it was, I didn't have to run to the ball and catch it. All I had to do was stand there and the ball came to me. It worked out well. Until someone hit a short pop fly to first base. I yelled, "I got it!!!" and right there and then, my mind was saying (what the hell did you just say??) Now I'm back to running and catching. I watched that ball come down in what felt like an eternity. I had it in my sights up until that split second when the ball hits the glove. Its like, I shut my eyes in that fraction of a second and turned my head away. I think it was instinctively to protect the AN side. Oh no, did I get it?
As soon as I recovered and opened my eyes, I turned the glove, opened her up, and there it was in all its glory. I actually caught the ball. To everyone, that was just another out. To me, that was a major accomplishment...but nobody could tell. Batting was actually even better. My timing was back and I adjusted my swing to compensate for the lag. No home runs to say, but I was very proud of my style of play. In the end, the game was tied. Everyone had fun, but this time it wasn't at my expense. I was actually proud of my style of play. Actually, hung around and chatted with the others.
On the drive home, I couldn't help but think. Today, you did good. You didn't let this AN beat you. So, I've decided to move softball back to the sports column I can still enjoy and play.
In all reality, those of you that know me know that I just had my 1yr MRI check up and they did find something however small and potentially something on the other side also. I didn't think I could be so unlucky to have another AN growing on the others side. I have resolved myself to just wait and hear from the Dr. next week. I am sure that another MRI will be in the works and possibly radiation of some sort. I try not to let it consume me, but I have to be honest. It does eat at you. My wife is worried and I am too. They did send home the MRI report, and I read it. But its just, alot of it might be this, it might be that. I've decided to keep living my life and deal with it as it comes.
Again, thanks for listening...
