The idea of surgery has me terrified but I am certainly not at all comfortable with the nudges of discussions from the ENT re radiation either.
Ann -
IMO one of the reasons treatment - radiation or surgery - is scary is because just being diagnosed with an AN is scary. If you were like me, you probably just assumed your symptoms were "no big deal" and that they'd either "go away in time", or turn out to be "nothing".
I was initially terrified of surgery, in fact I told my neurotologist at my first consultation that "there was NO way I could do THAT !!!"
but ironically, in the end, that's exactly what I did. I ended up being very confident in my choice - and in my doctors - and I've never looked back or felt I made a bad decision for me.
IMO the key to deciding on your treatment option is to be as informed as you can be. Do your research, weigh all the possible pros and cons of each procedure, ask all the questions you can, and then choose what is right for you. Education goes a long way towards alleviating fear.
I don't know if anyone else has recommended it to you, but you should contact the ANA and ask them to send you their informational literature. It's very well written and easy to understand. Unfortunately I was unaware of the ANA prior to my surgery and I think having their literature would have really helped me understand things. While my doctor was really great about "coming down to my level" and answering all my questions, I found that at times his explanations, while very clear to him, were filled with words that made no sense at all to me (I'm not one for medical terminology) and the anxious state I was in made me miss a lot of what he was telling me. If I would have read the ANA literature prior to my surgery, I think I would have helped me immensely.
Jan