Just found out I have AN and terrified

[Tracy725]

Hi. This is my first post. I found out this afternoon from the Dr that the MRI says there is an AN about 2cm or so. I've had hearing loss and tinnitus in my left ear for a couple of months now. The Dr put me on steroids and things actually started to get a little better. Then I get the call and wow. I'm a naturally anxious person and this is just killing me. I've been reading all over the internet, which is probably not a good thing, and I'm so totally blown away now and don't know what to do. I'm 48 years old with 3 kids, one graduating High School in a couple of months, and as it happens my wife is away this weekend on a field trip. I feel like there are no good options and that my life as I know it is over. I've been reading a lot of the posts here and the words of encouragement help. Any advice or words of encouragement would really help and a few prayers would sure come in handy too.
Thank You
Tracy

[sgerrard]

I feel like there are no good options and that my life as I know it is over.

Well, life as you knew it may be over, but the new life ahead of you is going to turn out to be a good one too.

The treatment options may not seem so great, but for most the outcome is good, and life goes on again. In fact for many it becomes richer in various ways. You will be fine.

Welcome to the forum, please feel free to ask any questions and share any concerns. There are many here who have been through it all and will offer information and comfort.

Let the posting begin.

Steve

[cindyj]

I was diagnosed about this time last year at 48 with a son about to graduate at the time also...I too was overwhelmed and confused, as are most that come here upon diagnosis. 

As Steve indidcated, between everyone here, we've been through just about everything possible related to AN's.  So, sorry you've been diagnosed, but so glad you're here and we will help in any way we can.  Let us know your questions and you'll get plenty of help, I'm sure.

Take a breath, know that AN's are typically very slow growing, you have options, and you now have tons of new friends to help you along the way!

Cindy

[Keri]

Hi Tracy,
Just keep reading here - you'll meet a lot of people that have had treatment years ago, some months ago, and like me, weeks ago.

I had hearing loss starting a year ago - my family doc tried a few meds (antibiotics, then allergy meds) then I would let too much time lapse before going back to the doc because I thought the hearing loss and 'stuffiness' in my head would just go away, but it didn't.  Summer came and went and I had signed up for a fall marathon. I decided I better make another appt with the doctor and he referred me to an ENT. I didn't want to go before the marathon - I was kind of afraid I might find out something bad even though I felt fine, so I made the appt for 2 days after the marathon.

I guess the ENT broke it to me pretty gently... I went in fully expecting him to say something like 'you have fluid in your ear; we'll do such and such and all will be well.' Instead he said that my hearing loss had been going on too long and I need to get the MRI with contrast. He mentioned that maybe I have some type of benign tumor. Well, that got my attention! We scheduled the MRI.... had to wait for that. Then after the MRI - waiting for the follow up appt. When I went to the ENT for follow up they called me back right away and told me I had an AN and that it was benign and there were several treatment options and 'here's a good neurosurgeon in Baltimore - that's what I'd do if I had this." I came home, got online and started reading too. I found when I read the medical stuff from other sites, the information was over my head plus it scared me a bit more. I found this site and started reading these forum posts and learned so much. Plus I had a million questions, which everyone answered with much patience (and they still do). The personal stories of people have been so helpful.

Many here will say 'welcome, well we wish you didn't have to be here, but we'll support you.' An AN is serious, but it's not the end of the world. There are so many success stories on here - Ernie, Scarlett - their surgeries were very recent (they may both have info under the AN community). There's many others as well.  Some have had successful radiation (Steve), others have had successful surgeries, both translab and the retro... (i can't spell it) that Kim and Jan had.  Others have had surgery with some complications but are bravely and successfully getting on with everything they need to do and are receiving lots of support here.  Others are awaiting their surgeries and started out here like you are - lots of questions and kind of nervous, but now they've made tons of new friends.  Anyway, you've been reading these posts and I hope I'm not boring you with info you already know!

Like you, I'm 48, also have 3 kids with one graduating in June (and he's going in the USAF, at which time I'll be on here asking everyone to pray for him and for me because I'll be nervous about THAT!)  I had my translab surgery 8 weeks ago. I'm doing pretty well. I'm thankful and I feel life is good. The whole situation has made my husband and I closer. I have a bit of facial paralysis that's most likely temporary and has gotten much better. I was a runner before surgery and I just slowly ran a half marathon last weekend.

Keep us posted on your progress and feel free to ask many questions! You will have many here who will help you and pray for you.

Peace to you,
Keri

[Rich56]

Hi Tracy,

Your life is not over, though it surely is about to change.

My wife was diagnosed 11/12/08, had surgery 9 days ago, and is doing really well.  Believe it or not, the AN has brought us closer than ever.

As I've told others, you are among the most compassionate, straight shooting group of people you'll ever meet, we don't know how we would have made it through with out them.

Welcome,

Rich & Scarlett

[msmaggie]

Life is different, but a lot more meaningful. Most of us don't take much for granted any more. Every AN takes its own course, and every person has to take ownership of his/her own circumstances.  All of us here are happy to encourage and support you as you find your way through this.  Let us know what you need.

Priscilla

[Kaybo]

Tracy~
I know it seems HORRIBLE right now but it WILL be OK.  Take a deep breath and a step back.  I am saying a prayer for you right now that you will be able to rest tonight and feel the PEACE and comfort that you will need to help you (& your wife) get thru the next weeks and months ahead of you!!  We are here for YOU!!

K

[moe]

Tracy,
Let us know more details about what the doctors say, and we'll be here for you through each step.
It is scary, especially the uncertainty of everything.  We have the technology to make it better, and you just learn to adapt to any changes.
Hang tough,
maureen

[anissa]

Tracy, welcome!  I was diagnosed with a 2.1 AN on February 11th and will be having translab surgery on Wed, April 1st.  It is shocking and has already changed my life, it did the moment it fell off my Dr.'s lips.  For me, reading and asking questions helped me to get more comfortable and the people here are so kind and willing to share their stories.  Best wishes as you begin your journey.

[EJTampa]

Hi Tracy,
 
Welcome to our group, and we're glad you found us!  I can say, without a doubt, that this is the BEST place you can be after being diagnosed with an AN!  I scoured the internet, just like you, and this is now the only place I come to (regarding AN's).
 
My story is much like everyone elses.  AN discovered last fall, waited until January before considering options, then finally decided on sugery a month later.  My tumor was removed March 5th, and I'm 3+ weeks post-op now.
 
There isn't much to add to what these wonderful people have already told you.  In most cases, the very hardest part of your AN journey (and it is a journey) is before you right now.  Acceptance, researching options, becoming comfortable with a great physician (radiation or surgical), then waiting for the day to arrive.  THAT'S the hard part. 
 
The day before surgery I had my pre-op stuff going on, which took hours and hours between my physicians tests and the hospitals tests.  The day of surgery I got up early, snarled about not being able to have a cup of coffee, got to the hospital by 5:30 AM, and things just flew from there.  Next thing I know I'm in post-op recovery!
 
Just be sure to research, research, research.  That's what people told me.  I got multiple opinions.  I was lucky that I had a highly recommended surgeon right here in my backyard, but I was all ready to travel across the country to do this.
 
I guess that's about all I have to add, and our thoughts and prayers are with you!
 
Ernie

[nteeman]

Tracy,

Your life isn't over, there's just a bend in the road. I had my 2.5 CM AN diagnosed 12/16/08, surgery 1/27/09 and back to work 2/27/09. I lost hearing in my AN ear and I am adjusting, but other than that life is pretty much the same. Actually I have other concerns (job issues, ailing mother) that take up more of my attention then my AN issues.

Get as much information as you can, investigate all your treatment options and make a decision. I found that once I made up my mind as to what my treatment course would be and booked it I felt very relieved.

I know it is very overwhelming at first but the more you learn, the more your path through this dilemma will become clear.

Neal

[leapyrtwins]

Hi, Tracy -

it's perfectly normal to be terrified by an AN diagnosis, but as others have said there is life after an AN - and I can tell you from my personal experience it's pretty damn good.  Things will work out for you; there are a lot worse things you could have been diagnosed with.

Two of the most important things to do are 1) educate yourself and 2) find a doctor (or doctors) who are experienced in treating ANs.

I'd also like to suggest you contact the ANA and request their information literature; very helpful IMO.

Mind if I ask where you live (what state) ? and what doctor you are seeing?  Perhaps others in your area have used the same doctor, or can suggest other doctors in your area that you might want to consult with.

Jan

[arkansasfarmgirl]

I'm 34 and had a 3 year old and a 6 week old when I was diagnosed last fall.  I had surgery in november, and with the exception of my facial paralysis, which is improving daily, my life is totally back to normal.  I feel good, I can do anything I want to do, and most important of all I can take care of my kids just like I would have been without this mess.  It was a rough road for a while, but I am most definitely not only alive, but LIVING.  The kiddos are now 4 years old and 7 months...

I freaked out and sold both my barrel horses after my diagnosis because I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to ride after surgery.  I wasn't able to ride before surgery because I felt drunk all the time.  Guess what, I'm horse shopping already!!  :-)

Hang in there.
Vonda

[Keeping Up]

I'm 34 and had a 3 year old and a 6 week old when I was diagnosed last fall.  I had surgery in november, and with the exception of my facial paralysis, which is improving daily, my life is totally back to normal.  I feel good, I can do anything I want to do, and most important of all I can take care of my kids just like I would have been without this mess.  It was a rough road for a while, but I am most definitely not only alive, but LIVING.  The kiddos are now 4 years old and 7 months...

I freaked out and sold both my barrel horses after my diagnosis because I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to ride after surgery.  I wasn't able to ride before surgery because I felt drunk all the time.  Guess what, I'm horse shopping already!!  :-)

Hang in there.
Vonda

Vonda

What an awesome update - congratulations.   

Tracy - sorry you are here.  While I am a newbie with a teeny little tumor (so W&W for now), I have spent enough time around here to see a lot of positive stories.  Even the ones with less than optimal outcomes have many a smile and positive experience to share.

Take your time - absorb the news but this diagnosis, in general, is far from the end of the world

Welcome

Ann

[MAlegant]

Hi Tracy,
Your life is not over, not by any means.  Maybe a couple of new challenges, but nothing you can't handle.  If we can do it, you can do it.  I really feel for you and remember being terrified and finding this forum and feeling more terrified but then posting and feeling cyber hugged.  You'll be fine.
All best,
Marci