Ramblings about the GUT feeling ...

[leapyrtwins]

I went with my gut feeling during my entire AN journey.

It all started the day I met my neurotologist.  After talking to him, my gut told me that I didn't need to look any farther or consult with anyone else.

I liked him, I knew he had the experience and could do the job, he was honest with me on all accounts (even insisted on giving me all the brutal statistics no matter how small of all the possible side-effects I faced in each treatment option - even though this scared the hell out of me), and I just knew he was the guy for me.  He also respected me and refused to make a decision for me - because as he rightly stated, I had options and it was my choice, not his. 

My next gut feeling related to my treatment decision.   I knew I didn't have the personality-type that is conducive to radiaton - I'm a control freak and want results ASAP; I don't like to wait - so my gut told me that surgery was my best bet.   I would know pretty fast what I'd be dealing with after my treatment and I'd go from there.     

Once I made the date for the surgery, met with the neurosurgeon, and organized everything in my life (job, kids, etc) so it would go smoothly during my recovery, I never looked back or questioned my decision.  I had a strange feeling of calm - even in the holding area waiting to go into the OR. 

I was confident I made the best choice for me based on my particular circumstances.  Second guessing yourself is counterproductive.

So my best advice is educate yourself, find a doctor (or doctors) that you have faith, trust, and confidence in, make your decision and just let go.  Don't look back.

Jan

[Jeepers]

Thanks, Jan. I really appreciate all the first-hand accounts.

See my post in the "Quick question" thread ... I expect to be making "the call" sometime next week. Making it scares me, but I have to do it. And like you say, from there, just chill.

I sure don't guarantee calm in the OR waiting area, but I'm pretty sure they've got some relaxing meds to keep me on the gurney 

[leapyrtwins]

I remember that call well.  Probably really surprised Dr. Battista, since I had just told him about a week prior that there was "no way" I could have surgery 

I think part of my calmness in the waiting area had to do with the fact that I had decided the AN had to come out - and I knew that surgery was the only way that was going to happen.  Sometimes being a very black & white type personality has it's advantages 

But, rest assured, the medical personnel will have lots of tricks in their bag for relaxing you, should you require it.  As we always say, patients are lucky from the perspective that they get to sleep through the surgery.  Starting the necessary meds a little early is just another perk 

[Sonja]

When I learned of my AN I  made researching AN my second job. After researching and consultations with both Radiosurgery and neurogery I decided to watch and wait. Like you my darn tumor would not rest and continued to grow. I was told I needed to make a decision within 90 days. I researched again like crazy and had about 6 consultations with neurogery, GK and CK. Originally I said was not letting anyone open my head. Well after all said and done it finally came to me. Surgery was the way to go. It was this GUT feeling.

I have learned through the years that everytime I sway againt my GUT feeling I am disappointed and learn my GUT wsa the right answer. This big of a decision I knew I had to go with my GUT. As soon as I had the GUT feeling there was no turning back and a peace with my decision. I can say I am doing remarkable 3 months out from surgery and I thank GOD and my angles, which I believe gave me my answer.

Good luck with making your decision and do not discount your GUT.