Sharon ~
I've followed this thread and haven't responded to it until now because I thought others, especially Jan (
'leapyrtwins') were offering you good information that I couldn't substantially add to.
I'm pleased to see that you're exploring your options and having multiple consults, which we always recommend. Jan's Dr. Battista is much like my neurosurgeon, who isn't in your area, unfortunately (I'm in Connecticut). Dr. Issac Goodrich is a mature (60's) neurosurgeon with over 3 decades of experience performing AN removals. Immediately following my AN diagnosis, I went looking for a neurosurgeon. Fortunately, I found the 'right' doctor on my second consult. He presented a clear plan to me and my wife (debulking surgery, then, FSR) and was quite unassuming, considering his excellent local reputation and very busy practice (the hospital nurses practically worshiped this doctor). He was indifferent to his fee and on our first visit, when we asked about his fee, stated, emphatically, that he would accept whatever my insurance company paid and that I
"shouldn't give another thought to his fee" but just
concentrate on "getting well". He meant it. Blue Cross paid Dr. Goodrich and his female assistant (another neurosurgeon he is training to take over his practice) $28,000. for their serrvices, including pre and post-op office visits. I never received a bill from his office. I offer all this information only to (a) praise my neurosurgeon and, (b) let you know that there are many fine, experienced, compassionate doctors working with AN patients around the country. I'm very pleased to learn that you're consulting with some of them in your area.
That stated, I am appalled when I read of nurses and other medical personnel that are rude and generally insufferable to patients seeking help from a doctor. I would consider writing a very civil, brief note to Dr. Chandler stating your displeasure with his nurse. Just for the record. He may approve of her tactics or be totally unaware of them. With your note, he'll know. Well, this is what I would do, because I don't suffer rudeness or incompetence easily. I may not 'make a scene' but I do make my displeasure known, in some manner. A brief note can do that. No demands or incivility, just a statement of your experience - and resulting displeasure. Or, you can just forget the whole thing, which is sometimes easier. I've done
that, too.
I wish you much success with your upcoming consult. Unfortunately, I won't be attending the upcoming ANA symposium in Chicago - but I'll be there in spirit!
Jim