new place

[kim508]

SO I'm 23 and pack my bags to Up state NY, about 7 hours away from my family. I got this paid internship. I know absolutely no one. I'm starting work on Monday and I kinda just need to talk to someone about this. No one know about my 3 surgeries or that I have no hearing in my left ear or that I have facial paralysis ( but you can still notice it) Its kinda nice no one knows but at the same time. Sooooo scary. I wanna be able to make friends and do good as my first real job being certified. Do I tell my staff, and how do I go about it. I dint have insurance for 2 months into the job. This also scares me and I'm insurance-less. I hoping this experiences will help me grow but its really hard having absolutely no one but yourself to count on with facial paralysis. I like the hole being on my own independent thing but I fall asleep wishing that I could do this with out getting an Acoustic neroma or at lest just in a few years when I'm setted and not in this confussed stage in my life. Even tho I understand there is no good time for a surgery to change your life. Still trying to find my purpose and if I can succeed at it. Thanks for listening.
Kim

[Jim Scott]

Hi, Kim ~

Congratulations on your new job (paid internship).  I remember being about your age and moving out of my boyhood home (on Long Island) to upstate New York (Glens Falls) for my first job as a radio D.J.  I was excited and nervous, as you are now and I did not have an acoustic neuroma in my recent past or any facial paralysis.  However, I did (then and now) have what is jokingly known in the broadcasting business as 'a face for radio'.    Still, I did O.K.

I can't tell you what your purpose in life may be.  No one really can.  As long as you keep yourself open to opportunities, time and experience will show you.  After a few false starts, that's how I eventually made a career as a radio broadcaster and also became a husband and father, rounding out my life pretty well, I believe.  I was able (most of the time) to recognize an opportunity and take advantage of it.  That included meeting and, a year later, marrying a wonderful young lady (Tina) and also having to move ten times in our first ten years of marriage for job opportunities but we didn't have any children and my wife is a saint, which made it all possible.  Decades later, we're still married I'm still grateful to her.  My point being that things will happen and you will have to make decisions.  Some may be very good decisions.  Some may not be so good.  That is the adventure life offers.  It is up to us what path to take. 

As for dealing with your facial paralysis, I suggest you be honest with anyone that asks, although I'll bet not many people will.  Those who get to know you will soon stop noticing.  Just as we get used to someone who wears glasses and their wearing glasses seems perfectly normal after awhile.  Meanwhile, never allow this one deficit to define who you are.  Work hard, be diligent at your work and live with integrity.  I know, I sound like a parent.  That's because I am and the advice I just gave you is exactly the same advice I gave my son when he graduated from college a decade ago.  It has served him well - and I hope it will do the same for you.     

Jim

[nancyann]

hi Kim, nice to meet you.  I had AN surgery 5 years ago, total facial paralysis, had the T3 surgery 11/2007.
My advice (as a 55 y/o) would be to just be yourself - introduce yourself to others & be the best you can be.
Best wishes with your new position.  It's not what you look like but who you are, what you bring to the table.
I got back to work 2 months after surgery - my motto is, after what I've been through, work is baby stuff !
I make sure I'm a team player, & I keep the mood positive at work.
I thank God for every day when I wake up, & keep a positive outlook because I love life !
Always good thoughts,  Nancy

[psmix]

Hi Kim,

I also have a deaf ear and facial paralysis. I'm nervous, too, around people that I don't know or who I haven't seen for a long time and aren't aware of my surgery and outcome. I try to act the same way I always did. I introduce myself. I smile (though not quite as broad as I used to.) I participate. When I find myself in situations where I might not hear someone because they're on my "bad" side, I just say, "I'm deaf on this side, so if you're trying to talk to me and I don't hear you, just nudge me!" I don't want anyone to think I'm ignoring them!

Occasionally someone will ask if I have Bells Palsey. Depending on who the person is that asks, I might answer that I had brain surgery that left me with symptoms very much like Bells Palsey, or I might explain that I had an acoustic neuroma. Very rarely, someone will say, "What happened to you?" They're not trying to be rude, they're genuinely interested and don't know how to ask. I find that if I'm matter of fact about it, everyone else is, too.

Good luck!
Pam

[Brewers7]

Hi Kim,
     Although I am considerably older than you, I have been dealing with SSD and facial paralysis in the work place.  As always, Jim gave some very good  advice.  You will develop strategies that work best for you.  I said a prayer for you that you will have peace, confidence and wisdom this week.

Susan

[Jeanlea]

Kim,

You've already gotten lots of good advice so I will just wish you well with your new internship! I'm sure you'll do fine.

Jean

[kim508]

I just wanted to say thanks...and its really nice being in a new place where no one knows all my baggage and are treating me nice and im getting experice and know that I have insurance im getting the secound part of my cross facial surgery in dec...merry christmas to me..i really am lucky even with having gone through all this!!